What Sort of Neighbor are You?

The house next to us is for sale, and an upstairs apartment on another side is getting a new renter. All these changes make me think about different sorts of neighbors.

We have two kinds of ‘neighbors’ in our house. Melissa is the hands-on neighbor. She’s the one on the ground level, working in the gardens on three sides of the house. She knows the names of the neighbors who walk their dogs. She knows the elderly couple who walk together without a dog, but love to talk about plants. She knows the names of all the dogs! She’s traded plants with some neighbors, loaned tools to others. She’s engaged. She’s the type of neighbor who will scoop up a dog that belongs three houses down and carry it home.

When Melissa’s outside, she’s right next to the sidewalk, and accessible, and friendly! (She’s not in this photo, but normally would be up in there with her wildflowers.)

And then there’s me.

I’m the neighbor sitting up on the deck. I’m surrounded by big planters on the deck railings overflowing with annuals. I’m either reading or writing or playing with a tarot deck. When I sit on the deck, most people don’t even know I’m there!

This is not an accident! Some days I’m even up on my little balcony, three stories up. No one thinks to look that far up. Even if they do see me, I’m really too far away to talk to up there!

It’s kind of weird that I isolate myself so much, but after twenty years of forcing myself to be an extrovert in order to speak at events, promote my books, teach workshops, etc. I wonder if, perhaps, I’m all “extroverted out.” I still love doing all those things, but when I’m at home, I just want to be in my own little bubble. I like that I don’t have to talk to anyone unless I want to…then I come down off my balcony or my deck and have a nice chat…but it’s my choice.

I don’t know if this behavior is left over from the pandemic, but it’s turned us into the Odd Couple. Melissa, the introvert, has become an extroverted introvert. And I’ve become an even more introverted introvert. Yikes. I could be mere steps away from turning into a hermit!

(I’ve posted a Substack every Wednesday for one year and five months, and haven’t missed a Wednesday. Today I’ve come close, but have managed to keep my record intact with this late post. Next Wednesday, however, I’ll be back waiting for you in your Inbox when you wake up in the morning. :-) )

Enjoy the rest of your week!